Recovery Tale
Friday May 1 one of my fellow group members completed 2 years clean and sober. Later on today he and his wife will renew their wedding vows. When PJ arrived here for treatment he was looking for help in stopping his coke addiction; it wasn't until part way through his stay that he realized his dependence on weed and alcohol were also impairing his daily functioning. By the time he arrived here his marriage was completely off the rails... he had spent a year couch-surfing at friend's places, until he eventually ran out of friends to use. PJ was seriously in debt having spent everything he had earned and racking up his credit cards to the limit. There were also some large sums owed to some not-very-nice-people who had fronted him large quantities 'on the cuff'. He was no longer employable; he was messed up.The last couple of loving things his wife did for him were to allow him to crash in their basement on the condition he called us to seek treatment. That he did and was allowed to stay during his 5 week wait for treatment.
PJ didn't exactly dive right into the Tx experience; he had his doubts; he balked; he argued. By the time he left though he had seen the evidence in others and was beginning to see some in himself. He decided to give the recovering life a shot - try it for 90 days and if at the end you decide you like the result stick around. If not, your misery will be refunded.
So, treatment over, PJ returned to his old home but under the same conditions; under the same roof as his wife and kids but living separately. He devoted himself to attending lots of meetings, chose to join the same group as me; looked around at and found himself a sponsor; worked together on getting through the step work; and got into being of service at the group level. At home he began to get more involved in the kids lives, their activities and school work - being a father to them once again. He and Tina began to spend more time together and revisiting their past problems; hashing things out. They started 'dating' again and exploring where the relationship might go. A little over a year ago Tina started to accompany PJ to our meeting once a month or so and she was happy to attend his one year medallion presentation.
About 6 weeks ago PJ sprung the news about renewing their vows on me and asked if I'd care to attend. When the big lump in my throat subsided enough for me to answer him I told him I'd be more than happy to. See, he'd been party to what had happened between Lynda and I - the separation, buying the townhouse, the move, those times. He also witnessed that reunion, the move back home and what has transpired since. PJ was watching, witnessing and was affected by what happened. Enough to give him the hope that it could happen for them as well.
God bless them both and their shared future. I plan on getting up early today so I can make it to the church for the service and on to the reception they've planned.
Today is also the sobriety date for our group's resident 'old-timer' Terry C ., who is celebrating 27 years committed to his ongoing recovery from alcoholism. My mentor. As I'm chairing our next meeting I get to make the presentations on behalf of the group recognizing their contributions to the group. A pleasure and an honour.
PJ didn't exactly dive right into the Tx experience; he had his doubts; he balked; he argued. By the time he left though he had seen the evidence in others and was beginning to see some in himself. He decided to give the recovering life a shot - try it for 90 days and if at the end you decide you like the result stick around. If not, your misery will be refunded.
So, treatment over, PJ returned to his old home but under the same conditions; under the same roof as his wife and kids but living separately. He devoted himself to attending lots of meetings, chose to join the same group as me; looked around at and found himself a sponsor; worked together on getting through the step work; and got into being of service at the group level. At home he began to get more involved in the kids lives, their activities and school work - being a father to them once again. He and Tina began to spend more time together and revisiting their past problems; hashing things out. They started 'dating' again and exploring where the relationship might go. A little over a year ago Tina started to accompany PJ to our meeting once a month or so and she was happy to attend his one year medallion presentation.
About 6 weeks ago PJ sprung the news about renewing their vows on me and asked if I'd care to attend. When the big lump in my throat subsided enough for me to answer him I told him I'd be more than happy to. See, he'd been party to what had happened between Lynda and I - the separation, buying the townhouse, the move, those times. He also witnessed that reunion, the move back home and what has transpired since. PJ was watching, witnessing and was affected by what happened. Enough to give him the hope that it could happen for them as well.
God bless them both and their shared future. I plan on getting up early today so I can make it to the church for the service and on to the reception they've planned.
Today is also the sobriety date for our group's resident 'old-timer' Terry C ., who is celebrating 27 years committed to his ongoing recovery from alcoholism. My mentor. As I'm chairing our next meeting I get to make the presentations on behalf of the group recognizing their contributions to the group. A pleasure and an honour.
Labels: AA, alcoholism, recovery
posted by Norm at 5/02/2009 03:26:00 AM
2 Comments:
Awesome. Congratulations PJ and Tina, this is inspiring to me.
My marriage broke up when I sort of fell apart after 6 years of being ill. I still don't quite know what went wrong with me and why I couldn't stay; it went deep.
So to see situations like this inspires me. And challenges me too. This is just wonderful to see, I hope you had a great time, Norm :)
I think their story is awesome and inspiring as well. The day went off really well and I was truly happy for them. So happy, relaxed and enjoying being with family, friends and co-workers. It was a'feel-good' situation all around.
Sue, always remain hopeful. I'm not at all familiar with your situation but focus on all the positive possibilities. They're out there waiting for you.
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