Lost Friend

Every Friday night we have an in-house meeting and there is a small core group of alumni who show up every week for it. Rain or shine, holiday weekend or not these fellows are here; for their own benefit and for the good of the guys going through treatment.

On arriving in time for the meeting tonight I was shocked and saddened to hear one of them had died today. 6 weeks ago David was a vital 69 year old gentleman brimming with energy and good cheer. Last time I saw him a couple of weeks before Christmas he mentioned he was feeling off and intended to get checked out by his doctor. At first look it didn't seem to be serious but his condition worsened rapidly and he spent Christmas in hospital undergoing a battery of tests. The diagnosis was pancreatic cancer. His deterioration was incredibly rapid. Now, just a couple of weeks later he is suddenly gone.

David went through treatment here a little over 3 years ago shortly after I started to work here. He really invested himself in his stay here and jumped into A.A. life following treatment. He and his family were enjoying his recovering life. He always showed up at least an hour before these Friday night meetings and we've enjoyed many talks. I'm finding it difficult to believe he's dead and we'll never have another of those talks.

I checked the local paper's online obit page and it is posted already. I know where I'll be Sunday afternoon. Paying tribute to a friend.

Updater

Re: The Horror

The media isn't divulging many details regarding the health status of those injured in the attacks the other night. The woman killed is being described as a hero who intervened when her husband was first stabbed. He continues to be in serious but stable condition. One of their children is also stable; the other appears to have sustained serious injuries and they are guarded in what the disclose about him. It doesn't sound good.

There may have been the unintended slant in what I wrote the other night that this was a family dispute gone seriously wrong. It turns out there is a connection but that it was a resident from across the hall who initiated the attack. He has a known history of mental problems and substance abuse / addiction. He has a relation to the family but a circuitous one.

There were 3 other young children present at the time but they were all uninjured, T.G.

** 3/12/08 - Just announced on the evening news that the youngest son, 3, succumbed to his injuries despite the very best efforts of emergency and all medical staff.

** 6/12/08 - Sadly, the husband and father has also died.

The Horror

Careful - you could find this upsetting. Don't read on if you think you might be.

A little background...... When Lynda and I split up early last year - February, I think she lowered the boom - we continued living under the same roof until I was able to move, in July, to the townhouse I bought. That interim period was difficult to say the least but we managed to make it work for the most part pretty successfully. Once I moved I gradually got to know my immediate neighbours and spent some time with them; had a nodding acquaintance with many others in the development. Saw all the usual comings and goings; got to know various people's connection to one another and their schedules. During our time apart we weren't really on our own much and chose to spend most of our free time together either at the house or my place. Eventually we reconciled our differences and I moved back home at the beginning of May this year. When I moved back Lynda's youngest son moved from the house over to the townhouse and set up housekeeping there. Close enough to be handy; distant enough for some separation - like 5 kilometers worth.

Fast forward to today - Just as Lynda and I began to eat dinner we got a call from her son - Moose, as he is affectionately known. 'Can I call you back? We're just eating.' "No - you're going to want to hear this." Looking out the front living room window he had seen a guy sitting on the curb with blood gushing from his neck, soaking him, when a police car came screeching in; sirens screaming; lights flashing. One officer attended to the guy; the other approached the nearest entrance following the blood trail. He is confronted by a guy wielding a knife and is stabbed; draws his gun, warns him to drop the weapon and then shoots him. More police arrive followed by fire trucks and ambulances. Inside they find 2 more men injured, a woman dead plus two children gravely injured. We continued to get periodic updates from Moose throughout the evening and at the height of the episode there were 5 ambulances, 3 fire trucks and 20 police cars. All driveways were taped off and blocked; returning residents were made to park at adjoining properties and escorted to their homes. Apparently now they are down to 5 police cars and 2 forensic vehicles - a 10 ton truck and a Winnebago. It was the lead item on the news at 11. The man wielding the knife was shot dead. The occasion was a family birthday party.

So, enough reportage. While I don't know any of these people involved I am, on an emotional level, completely aghast and appalled; shaken and sorrowed. Things like this are reported all the time and I suppose for myself the 'distance' factor comes into play. Oh, it's in that city down the road or across the continent, or that neighbourhood over there that we've passed through from time to time. A comfort cushion that removes it a comfortable distance away so it doesn't affect me to the same extent. But this incident happened 60 feet from my old front door. 60 feet - my door!! I've seen these folks going about their lives on a daily basis - they've seen me coming and going about my business. Now 2 of them are dead, 2 other adults seriously injured and the children - 3 and 5 years old - stabbed and fighting for their lives. Oh... the children... scarred for life if they make it. Physically , mentally and emotionally. Lord hear my prayers. They were airlifted into Toronto for the best possible care, thankfully.

I don't want to let my mind venture into what happened within that home during those critical minutes - such insanity; such horror; much sorrow. But venture it will, I'm sure.

Homicide - a nice, neat word for bloody murder.

http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_29629.aspx

Periodical Posting

Where this blog relates to publishing..... well it isn't a daily; certainly isn't a serial and I hope it never becomes a soap. It's just going to have to fit somewhere along the pace of life...periodically.
It's been a very hectic, off balance, sometimes frustrating, occassionally rewarding and painful stretch for the last month or so.

The only highlights in the last week have been some good time spent with Lynda, getting to a meeting with a new sponsee (and getting to know him a bit better), and helping another sponsee with some step work. And we heard a wonderful speaker at tonights meeting who had a very powerful message of recovery - a very engaging young gal who attained one year sobriety yesterday.

My heart sank when Sarah called Friday morning to say that Shorty had suffered a stroke on Thursday morning. Her Mom and Russ had flown in from Calgary Thursday night; Sarah arrived from Vancouver Friday morning. Lynda and I joined the rest of the family at the hospital for the balance of the day Friday but it was clear that there was no hope for recovery. We carried on over the weekend with our work about the house but our hearts weren't really in it - our minds were elsewhere. My friend and work mate John has offered to cover my shifts on an 'as needed' basis this week; for that I'm grateful. Relief of that worry!

So I'll continue to write when I can; it just won't be as often as I'd like. Next time something more cheerful - honest.