Quick update

No particular reason - I just needed a shot of colour today.

Lynda emailed me earlier from her work to let me know my boarder has been thoroughly checked out - xray, catscan, bloodwork, neuro consult - and has been released. She will bring him home later when she gets off work. Such a relief he is alright.....

Cousin BJ made me laugh with the opening line from an email today - 'so when are you starting to write the book????' Write?? Write about what?? This family could use an author though; we're due I think. Maybe one of our kids.......???

Enough for tonight. I'm too pooped to think straight.

Some Upset.....

Not wanting to be all reactionary I didn't post regarding this but returning home Sunday morning at the end of my work week I was greeted by a few splatters of blood on my door. I was sure those marks hadn't been there when I locked up the night before - instant alarm ringing in my head; radar on. Inside I found my boarder's coat positively soaked with blood; all down the front and both sleeves. Despite the early hour (6) I couldn't go to bed without making sure he was alright. I let myself into his room and he spoke to me right away saying not to worry - that, yes he'd gotten beaten up and, no he didn't want to go to hospital. He refused to turn on the light in order for me to check his injuries. When I got up that afternoon, so did he. He's a mess - both eyes blackened, nose bent, cheeks scuffed, a big bloody knot on his forehead, cracked ribs. And still refusing treatment because of who had done it to him - questions will be asked. When he told me who had done it my heart sank to my shoes; sickening. It stirs the desire for revenge.

I'm wishing tonight that we had addressed it appropriately the other day....

**Later on - I just arrived home after taking him to the hospital to be checked out properly. He was experiencing some symptoms consistent with concussion - dystygmia, visual disturbances, numbness and tingling, jabbing pains in the head. Better safe than sorry. We went to the hospital where Lynda works so I dropped him at Emerg and headed down for a quick visit with Lynnie. She was wrapping up her night of work so we checked on him before I walked L to her car. We'll see how this all plays out tomorrow. Oh, for a boring uneventful life.........

Elvis Costelllo asked "What's the matter with love, peace and understanding?'. Good question.

Health Matters.....

A couple of you have enquired lately about what I'm doing to take care of myself so here's the low-down. I'm closing in on 6 weeks since the onset of this cold and it went through all the usual stages right into bronchitis....and back out and still the congestion lingers. I've probably pushed myself too hard and should have taken some time off for a solid rest; I didn't and so the blessed thing doesn't seem to want to leave.

Action taken - back to the doctor today and he re-prescribed the two puffers I've been using and also sent me for a chest x-ray. Yesterday I made an appointment for a hypnotherapy session to quit smoking - a method I had success with 20 odd years ago. That appt is in a couple of weeks. I already had a quit date set which I continue to prep for ( it is approaching quickly) by writing down my triggers, 'positive' aspects to smoking (a short list), as well as all the negative impacts (a long, long list), things that I do in association with smoking, listing the resources I have at hand and plan to use. Plus, I'm praying to be gradually relieved of the obsession to smoke. (What does the god of my understanding want for me?? He wants me to live a long, healthy life free of smoking tobacco.)

As for rest; that is a rare commodity. I haven't been sleeping and for no apparent good reason. These last couple of days have been free of work commitments and I've done a lot of running around but nothing taxing. Tonight will be another early one for hitting the sack. Looking ahead I'm facing 10 or 11 straight days and nights of work so I'll be concentrating on rest, diet and various other sorts of self care to get me through. Wish me luck and thanks for your concern. I'll be fine eventually physically. Mentally, emotionally and spiritually I'm fit.

Leave An Impression.....

.... wherever you tread.

Even if it is move a planter beneath a dripping downspout in order that the neighbours can sleep.

Snow certainly can get grungy looking when it has been lying around awhile......

Recent pictures

Lynda took this one at Owen's birthday party Saturday. It was well attended and Owen had fun dragging Gramma around playing with all his toys.

This is Milo's reaction to Lynda whimpering and whining behind the camera. While Lynda was in the pet food store she ran into someone who is familiar with Milo from before his adoption. Speculation continues as to daddy's identity and breed; the groomer came out and said he's a dead ringer for another pup she had seen recently that was the offspring of a Rhodesian Ridgeback. Could just be with that confirmation and colouring; we'll see.

Yesterday was a lazy day - I slept in, got cleaned up, dropped in on Lynda to see if she needed any groceries to hold her through the week, and then enjoyed a couple of quiet Sunday night shopping hours at the 'evil empire'. It was glorious just putzing around the store checking out the merchandise with no one wanting or needing anything from me. (It's amazing when you hit the checkout just how much money you can run through though.) For a change I didn't run into anyone I know during the outing and didn't have to do anything but occupy myself with my thoughts. I dropped a couple of items off to Lynda at the house, beat it home and started to eat, ate some more, continued eating and then had some dessert. Mea culpa, I couldn't stop and that might have had something to do with why I was unable to sleep. I had a lot of plans for today and I'm way behind but have made a couple of arrangements by phone for tomorrow's appointments.

My home group meeting is tonight and we're having elections for a variety of positions prior to the actual meeting for our group members. It doesn't involve me as my term is 2 years and it'll be nice to see more involvement from other members on a regular basis to ensure things run smoothly.

Time to get cleaned up and get on with the day..... what's left of it.

Sunday Getting Up

These last couple of days we've enjoyed a large high pressure system which has given us lots of sunshine, livable day time highs nudging 0 degC and very crisp nightime lows in the -15 range.

Today as I was enjoying my 'morning' cig & coffee I was interested by some of the shapes the snow is taking on as it melts, the texture as it becomes more crystalline and the random patterns created by the wind borne detritus that accumulates through the season..... dirt, grit, bits of leaves... cigarette ashes, perhaps...

The neighbours may have thought me strange lying on my patio getting these shots, and maybe I am.... but what the heck. Barely awake gathering shadows and light - that's me. Take me as I am.

Not One, But Two.......

Nice surprises!! Woo-Hoo!

The first was the other day when I checked my mail only to find a thank you card from my niece and her partner for having returned them to the city a couple of weeks ago. Saved them some time and aggravation not having to take the train and transit. Enclosed was a gift card for HMV - my favourite - MUSIC !!! Any flavour or colour you like. On my way to work tonight I stopped and picked up Eric Clapton's 'Crossroads Guitar Festival 2007' 2 DVD set. 4+ hours of the finest guitarists around performing in Chicago last summer.

#2 was earlier tonight when speaking with my son R. He had taken his g'friend for an ultrasound today and they decided they wanted to know the baby's sex. IT'S A GIRL!!!! The due date stays the same - July 25. He's happy and excited; as am I. A cousin for Z.

Todays news - This is Owen's 4th birthday. Lynda and her 2 other sons are heading out to help him celebrate his big day. I'm working tonight and tomorrow night so I emailed him a greeting. 21st century grampa and all....

I was supposed to have next week off - 7 nights on, 7 off - but lo and behold my services are needed again. My boss asked me to cover a series of day rotation shifts Wed, Thurs and Friday over into Saturday morning. At least I have a couple of days to adjust my body clock this time around. Then I'm back to work next Sunday night. What it boils down to is that everything I was going to do will have to be done on Monday and Tuesday.

Last night was a night of diversion after catching up on some emails - then it was into tracking down concert videos on youtube of artists and bands, both famous and obscure. Got a little carried away with that, lemme tell ya. Toward the end of the night I remembered I was supposed to have been checking air fares and schedules to Vancouver for S & D's wedding in June.

Today I took my time getting myself together and cleaned up; lackadaisical I think you call it. Befogged, somewhat. Once ready I headed to the house and had a couple of hours together with Lynda before coming to work. Work wise this has been a very quiet week - low house population, phones are silent, work load manageable - and that is a very good thing as I've had remarkably little sleep. No good reason; just not sleeping.

Hmmm... jinxed myself by mentioning the phones. Actually daughter S returned my call and gave me the lowdown on the last few days. Z was very verbal in the background - now he just has to learn English. He's almost crawling; up on all fours. Now he just has to put it into motion.

Rock Garden....

.... this is where I go to ponder heavy thoughts.

Full Lunar Eclipse

Notwithstanding conflicting media reports as to the onset time and expected duration of tonights eclipse we couldn't have asked for better viewing conditions. Zero cloud cover, low humidity, frigid temperatures (-15C), with a bonus of no wind which made extended viewing possible.

We were heading out to an area meeting tonight and I announced before we left that by the time the meeting was over the eclipse would have started. Sure enough when we loaded back on the bus at 9 it was underway and during the drive the guys were commenting on it periodically. 20 drunks and druggies crowding to one side of the bus..... quite a sight. Time and again the same sorts of comments - I'm glad you mentioned it; happy to see it; if I'd been using I wouldn't have cared, noticed, given a damn; how many people do you suppose are all watching this now?

Back at the centre the guys were taking turns popping out into the cold to check it out and update the others as to how it was progressing. A couple were frustrated that they had to go to bed before it was finished; it wasn't complete until 12:15. During the complete eclipse phase the moon took on a distinct reddish tinge and I was still able to discern some of the lunar features. By the time it was near done the moon, Saturn and a bright star had swung into a perfect tight triangle - something to see.

Check Out The Map On This.....

Too damned cute not to share - here's more Milo. And, of course, if you want a real close up - right click the picture and select 'open link in new window'.

My work here is done. Time for bed - g'day.

Oy-Dee-Doy-Dee-Doy......

On one hand..... I'm happy to report feeling better physically tonight than I have in weeks. Hooray!

On the other hand..... I've received some upsetting news that I'm still processing and resisting the urge to write about. I do tend to get somewhat reactionary oftimes and need to be mindful of the fact that I don't have to regurgitate all the nitty-gritty details here. (You can thank me later.......)

This too shall pass. This too shall pass. This too shall pass.

Introduction

This one is just for the heck of it - a couple of small planters that were left out for the season, sporting their own little mountain of snow.

Here's the intro picture - not a bad one of Milo; a pretty awful one of Lynda - taken just inside my front door. Milo is a short haired pup so he has an insulated jacket complete with reflective bands. I haven't heard as yet how their first night together went..... heh, heh, heh.

Regarding 'Woody'........

Woody being the name I gave the young fellow in foster care that I've worked with for the last few months. Last week I had a very terse email message from Woody's foster father saying he had been removed from their home. Since then I had a reply to my message to he and his wife, thanking me for my efforts on Woody's behalf. The only other word I've had is through a third party to say that he is now in residence at an area group home with other teens. Sad.

In reviewing my notes I'm unable to see where I could have presented anything more to him or in a different more manageable form. The fact is that he was defiant and wanted to continue doing things his way despite consequence. He wanted to drug despite what any authority might have to say or do about it. He failed to recognize that he had an entire team of people trying to divert him from this path onto one of change.

Hardly the outcome any of us wanted for him.

In Other News....

.....right before coming to work tonight I had a quick visit from Lynda. She had just come from picking up our new dog, Milo, and we had a brief meet & greet. The thinking had been that he is a Jack Russell / Pug mix but no one is too sure who daddy might be so the pug factor could be off. I can't see it anyhow. I got one shot of he and Lynda so I'll try to post it later today when I get up. He sure is cute.... and good natured too. He came all decked out complete with a coat to protect him from the cold.

Now to see how he fits in with the rest of the menagerie - our other dog Freedom; the boarder's dog Shelby; and our cats Libby and Buddy. Should be interesting!

** Anyone using Blogger having trouble with spellcheck?? I keep getting a 'Message Failed' response when I remember to use it (thus revealing the fact that I am sometimes spelling 'challenged'.)

Aural Pleasures.....

..... I had written recently about having changed up my listening habits - less of the familiar classic rock; more current pop, more jazz, more classical. Primarily I've been listening to Canada's national radio broadcaster CBC and for the most part enjoying what I've heard. The stylistic range is incredible; everything from alt & techno right on through to orchestral.

Lynda and I were listening Sunday morning while we worked to a themed show called 'In The Key Of Charles' with this weeks theme being angels - 'Calling All Angels'. We both thoroughly enjoyed the show with it's interesting variety of music.

In recent days during some downtime at home I've gone to this link for the homepage; third tab down on the left to Concerts on Demand and enjoyed some really fine music..... to name a few; Jesse Cook; Jim Cuddy; Oscar Peterson Tribute; Wailin' Jennys. There will be something here for all tastes.

I noticed tonight while cruising the site is the fact they have a number of downloadable podcasts - something else to check out when I have the chance.

Explore and enjoy.

Feeling Punked.....

..... just only sayin'. This isn't going to be a bitch session - just sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm loosing track of the weeks; I think it is 5 weeks now since I contracted the super-bug and it is definitely wearing me down. So I might not have much to say - this is basically a check-in to say I'm still around.

Tonight I'm back at work getting organized for the week. Most of the weekend was spent with Lynda at both our places. Nice to have options, ain't it? Today in the morning we rushed through 'that job' we do each weekend so I could attend an AA committee meeting. I represent my home group at the General Service district table. Then I beat it home for a quick lie down so that I might make it through the night without hitting the fatigue wall. On arising I immediately had one of my auras, this one was pretty strong and lasted a fair while - minutes instead of seconds. (Geez, think that could have something to do with my frame of mind tonight?)

Saturday Lynda devoted a few hours to cleaning Mom and Linda's place top to bottom while I took Mom out shopping. Linda is still in recuperation mode, unable to lift or bend, 3 weeks post-surgery. Saturday night, although we'd seen it when it came out, we re-watched 'Sleepless in Seattle'. Isn't memory a strange thing? I remembered almost nothing; storyline, images, nada..... I just had the vaguest of impressions that it had been a good movie that I wouldn't mind seeing again. If there was a message to be taken from it, it would be to appreciate and attend to those you love. How quickly things can change. In relating that to Lynda and I and our experiences of this last year it is very difficult to reattain 'love'. There were plenty of times that I thought myself foolish to continue trying. I'm glad now we didn't give up; we're continuing to work things out and plan for a common future.

Funnily enough - checking blog-mates posts - and there is talk of people whose posts are abruptly ended or sites deleted seemingly without reason; and the sorts of feelings that leaves for the readers who have come to 'know' them. I had been wondering a couple of times lately what would happen to mine if I should suddenly become ill or otherwise incapacitated. Send detailed instructions to cousin BJ or JPW on how to leave one last message; leave it up for a couple of weeks; then log back in and hit the delete button??? Seems a shame after all the hours spent typing away, figuring out how to post pictures and make links. Pretty pedestrian stuff for a lot of people but there was a definite learning curve at work there for me.

I'd also been thinking last week that it is time for another look for mine and it's time to update the sites I link to as well. A couple of mine have become inactive or otherwise need changing up to better reflect my interests and tastes.

Hmmmm.... seems I'm sharing this office with a mouse or a mole .... looks more like a mole. Must go usher the little bugger outside where he belongs.

and, ohhh - we didn't get all that snow we were supposed to get. It's been teeming with rain all day and night.

A Day At The Beach.....

...which is a bit of a lie.... 15 or 20 minutes was enough to bring me to the verge of frostbite. Althought the lakefront is just a quick 10 minute drive from either home I don't get down there very often. Because it had been fairly mild - just around freezing - early today and we were getting some sunshine for a change I thought I'd take a run down. Only problem being that the wind direction had changed from SW to NW causing the temp to drop and windchill to rise. This first shot is looking west toward Toronto along the north shore of Lake Ontario. This is the beach and lakefront park in Oshawa.

A look back the way I'd come; toward the pier and harbour area. Those domes are for storing the salt and sand mixture that is spread on the roads prior to and during snow storms. On the right side of this shot you can see some lake effect snow showers sweeping in.

An ice bridge at the waters edge. Unfortunate about the angle of the lighting..... and look at those crazy Canada geese floating out there. I'd perish in about 10 seconds in that water.

This is looking due south down the length of a man made look-out pod that juts into the lake. 25 or 30 miles across the lake is Rochester, New York. Hellooooooo!

This walk took just about 20 minutes and was perhaps a kilometer long but by the time I made it back to the car my eyes and nose were streaming, ears blazing red and damn near frozen off, chest heaving from gulping the cold air. If only the wind hadn't picked up... if I'd worn a hat and gloves..... it wouldn't have been as invigorating. Nice to be out and about enjoying the day - I'm ALIVE!!

It's time for something savoury for supper.

Here's The Answer......

.... to the aforementioned teaser.

But first some music befitting the day. Happy Valentine's Day! Hugs and kisses all round.

So, my son Russ had emailed and asked me to phone him last weekend; that tipped me something was up. When I called I wasn't able to reach him and left a message as to when he could contact me. Another email, another plan to phone. Russ and I aren't in frequent contact, get along fine face-to-face but our phone conversations are always awkward and stilted. A pair of gifted conversationalists, we aren't.

Lynda and I were sitting here last night when I recalled that I was to have called him. A little after midnight here; 10 p.m. there - no problem. He picks up and we yack back and forth catching up on recent events and the conversation is quickly running out of steam after just a few minutes. So I ask the question - 'Well Russ, do you have some big news for me?' Yeah Dad; actually I do. You're going to be a grandfather again at the end of July!

Originally Lynda hadn't planned to talk to him, not wanting to horn in on our time on the line but ... as soon as I said to him 'So when is Melissa due?' she was just abouncin' and wanting the phone. Between the two of us we got the full story to date - she's 17 weeks along; the pregnancy has been going fine; was having an ultrasound today; they're undecided about whether they want to know the baby's sex, or not; are looking for a place to live; are talking about marriage but no decision as yet.

I'm really pleased for them - they make a great couple and I think they would be terrific parents. I wonder if I can get a deal through one of the airlines for these upcoming frequent trips to Vancouver and Calgary. Gotta BE THERE!!!

**Note** to cousin BJ - You know that family tree you and our fave Aunt did?? Best add another branch, darlin'.

Snow Daze.....

I thought I'd share these as I finally got around to downloading my camera software to my re-jigged computer. If you happen to be in warmer climes perhaps these will cool you off for a moment or two. This top shot was taken about a week ago from my townhouse doorway looking across the complex. That is a crab apple tree with a nice dusting of the fluffly stuff.

This shot was taken yesterday over at the house from the kitchen looking out at the little side patio after our most recent storm. Nice, eh? Later on in the day a high pressure system swept in so it was clear, sunny and bright. We're in for another small storm tomorrow night and the forecasters are telling us there is another major one heading our way Sunday into Monday which is supposed to dump another 20 cm. (about a foot)

Ah, the joys of Canada in February...... (please tell me why I still live here.....) Florida, the gulf coast of Texas, Arizona and California all sound good right about now. So do Jamaica, Dominican Republic and Trinidad.

**TEASER** - I have some major news to share later; good stuff. Woo-Hoo!!!!!

Ahhhh.... Almost..... Soon

I managed to get clear from work before 10 this morning so I headed for the house as Lynda had invited me for brunch during a late night phone call last night. She had asked me to pick up bread and while in the grocer's I noticed a display of flowers. The produce manager Curly (a bald guy) saw me checking them out and told me they had just come in the door. Amongst them was a beautiful bouquet of deep red roses - they had Lynda's name all over them. It's a day early for Valentine's but better early than to come up short at the last minute; I bought them. She liked them a lot and we had a couple of good hours together catching up on our news.

I came home to clean up and change before my neuro appointment, dashed off again and had one of the shortest sessions ever with a doctor. 'Champix / Chantrix for you?? Not a chance!' The latest news regarding it is the FDA is reviewing whether to continue to make it available or not - there have been a number of suicides associated with its use and increased incidence of psychotic episodes. 'Try hypnosis, the patch and gum, accupuncture, laser therapy, go herbal and don't smoke but you aren't going on this medication.' Okay doc - that's why I rely on you. You know best. (...and you were right Susan in your warning)

Seeing as how it has done nothing but snow here recently I went to Mom and Linda's place to check on them, see if they needed anything and whether they needed any shovelling done. I wakened Linda when I arrived; she'd been resting completely prone on the living room sofa. She's still not feeling awfully well, moving very freely nor eating or drinking very much. We three yacked while Mom and I had a couple of cups of tea.

Supplies have been running low here on the homefront so on the way home I stopped at a department store and grocery to re-stock on some essentials. Dinner is in the oven cooking while I've checked friend's blogs and caught up on emails. It is simple but rib-sticking fare... mmm.... mmm

I had the pleasure of running into and catching up with friend JPW the other night. We hadn't seen one another in months, since we met up at that chicken joint.... in the fall? He's looking well, is happy and has been as busy as a one-armed paperhanger; sorta like me. Which is the best reason we haven't met up - our schedules don't jive. One day again soon, I hope.

Earlier when I stopped in to clean up I checked my various email accounts and there was a disturbing one from 'Woodys' foster dad. A bare bones message with no details; that Woody had been removed from their home the previous evening; that I should call his worker for details. ACCKKK! Crap!! His life just changed dramatically for the worse. The message I left with the worker is unanswered.

There was a plan in mind for tonight - a soak in the tub, a movie, maybe a snooze. I've been dithering about trying to figure out whether I should go out and take in a meeting for my own benefit, or stick to the plan. I'm going to stay in and get some rest, I think. As I was leaving the house earlier today I invited Lynda to pack a bag and come by when she gets off work later. Now that's a plan I'd like to see come together.

Oh - one last thing. I haven't posted comments to friend's blogs much lately but I make quick check-ins and I also know who my frequent visitors are. Kel, your trip will soon be upon you - may it be everything you can possibly imagine and much, much more. Robin - your writing, your photography and the way you match them up with your collection of quotes continues to dazzle me. Awesome! The Exquisite E - beautiful child. BJ - keep those prayers coming; mind if I share one here one day? JPW - stop lurking and being lazy; post a comment once in a while. Susan - good to be back in touch.

Time for the show folks...... gotta go.

Rolling With Changes........

Until I got up today and checked my email I had a fairly quiet week planned and I was looking forward to some restful downtime. In the course of a few minutes on the computer plus a phone call I'm a busy guy again.

I called Mom's place to see how Linda has been fairing post-surgery only to have Linda tell me I'm doing a pick up run when I get off work come morning. My brother's eldest daughter & family came to visit them from Vancouver. His daughter had a baby about 6 weeks after Zeph was born and none of us had seen the wee one. Bro drove down Saturday morning and picked Mom up so she could go meet her great grand daughter. We're meeting in the morning at the half way point about 2 hours north of here and I'll bring Mom the rest of the way.

One of the emails was from my boss asking if I'd work a day shift Monday plus an overnight shift Tuesday morning over into Wednesday morning. It means I'll miss a session with young 'Woody' Tuesday night and I've sent a message to cancel it. In addition to that I chair my home group meeting Monday night and then rush across town to an NA meeting where a friend is celebrating 20 years clean. Wednesday afternoon I have an appointment with my neurologist to see if he'll approve my using Champix for smoking cessation.

The plan is that following the appointment I'm going home for a long soak in the tub, drink a pot of tea, unfold the pull-out couch, put a movie on and who cares if I see any of it. Watch or snooze? Don't matter to me. At this point I don't have anything further planned until Thursday afternoon. I'm really, really hoping nothing else changes between now and then.

Lynda is working afternoon shift all week so our time together will be catch-as-catch-can.

I've never slept during one of these nightshifts but I think I'll go find a quiet spot, close my eyes and relax for awhile.

Over It Now....

'It' being myself. Perhaps I overstated how I was feeling last night as a number of things were working on me. I've been physically unwell for long enough, 4 to 5 weeks, that it's starting to affect the way I think, my attitudes. What I should be doing is enjoying the slowed pace of things and concentrating on recuperating fully - body and mind. There was some wishful thinking at play there, too. That I'd like to sneak a peak at the 'big' plan the Big Guy has in mind for me. Sometimes it would be nice to see where destiny will lead. The 2+ months on day rotation were enough to confirm for me that is the sort of work I'd like to do on a full time basis. It's frustrating that there is no opening here for me to fill. One of the counsellors suggested I randomly sprinkle cyanide over a plate at lunchtime. I told him to be careful; that there would be no favoritism. Ha, ha, ha.

Tonight was a later start time for me as it was an in-house meeting so I laid in late this afternoon. By the time I had a couple of coffees into me Lynda was off work and running hither and yon on a shopping run. I caught her on her cell and invited her over for dinner so we had a few hours together before coming to work. The menu - baked pork chops, scallopped potatoes, fresh veggies; Shiraz for Lynda, blueberry juice for me. We hadn't had many opportunities to talk much this week so we caught each other up on all the details. Besides more talk about how our reunion will happen the big news is that it looks like we're soon going to have a new pet. In addition to our dog Freedom and cats Liberty and Buddy we can look forward to Milo - a Jack Russell / Pug mix who is 13 weeks old. Milo is currently in the care of the daughter of one of Lynda's workmates; she is a vet's assistant and trainer. Milo already has the hang of sit, stay, down, over, and fetch. Something to look forward to, to be sure.

An update of my boarder Al: he was to come up with his rent money today. He wasn't home when I got up and hadn't arrived by the time I came to work. I'll see what is going on tomorrow but here is where things get difficult in that he is a friend of my stepson. If he has no money I don't want to be paying his way nor do I want to put him on the street....... what to do? Follow my conscience, I suppose.

When I come back to work tonight the bunch of us head off to my girlfriend Audrey's homegroup; it'll be good to see her as it's been a few weeks between visits. My producer / director friend is bringing a copy of her latest documentary for me to see because I missed it when it aired before Christmas. (I still didn't have cable then. Since I had it installed 6 weeks ago I think I've turned the TV on 3 or 4 times.)

Enough blather for tonight; I'm certainly in a better frame of mind compared to last night.

Good Intentions.....

....oh, yeah; lots of them.

Heading into this first week back on nights I had all kinds of plans regarding things I'd like to accomplish, or simply do, indulge in..... I'd forgotten the type of brain and body 'fog' that goes with working this shift. Not enough sleep / quality sleep; sporadic poorly spaced meals when I remember to eat; too much high test coffee - not enough tea and water. I had intented to reserve some time each night for stretching and light exercize to ease some aches and pains. Hmmm, haven't done any of that as yet. Still aching.....

Ennui? Is that the right word? Floating in the moment and not motivated to do much of anything.

I had lots of topics in mind to blog about as well. I guess I should have noted them - ha, ha - cuz they certainly aren't coming to mind. There have been emails to respond to, comments to be left on posts, connections neglected that should be re-established.... okay, I've done a fraction of those things, a few but not nearly enough.

Sunday before I came in I loaded my tote bag with texts from school and notebooks that I wanted to review in order to refresh my memory - they're untouched; maybe tomorrow night.

These last few months I've changed my music listening habits and dialing in jazz and classical radio stations. I've begun noting composers, players and titles - some very familiar, some obscure - that bring joy to my ears, so that I can track down the recordings for my collection. One modern piano piece that I found particularly stirring was from the documentary 'Mark Twain's America'. Beautiful!

Perhaps I should heed the advice emblazoned across the side of a car which I saw on the way to work tonight -"Carpe Diem". I feel I'm wasting time, wasting life, twiddling my thumbs and staring into the ether.

Wild & Wooly

First the music.

Weather-wise this last 24 hours has been nuts, lemme tellya. It started to snow heavily around 2 a.m. last night and by the time I was leaving at 5:30 there was already 4 inches of snow on the ground. I took it easy going home and it took about twice as long to get there compared to usual. Driving in this stuff doesn't bother me but some of the other drivers sure do. They seem to think that because they have powerful vehicles , SUV's or 4 wheel drive it somehow makes them immune to the laws of physics. Duh!

There was a lull through the day while I slept but part 2 of the storm began when I got up for the day. Getting back to work was worse and when I got here called the bus company to cancel our intended trip to an outside meeting. It was being held in a town north and east of here with a lot of twisty, hilly terrain between here and there. I don't think so.....

It was relatively mild earlier - around 0C - but has cooled off considerably now. The snow falls have been coming in waves; sometimes heavy, some light. We have about 10 inches now and drifting in spots to 18. There are a few hours to go before I leave for home so I'm hoping the plows get out, get busy and have the roads clear.

Sister Linda has a post-surgery appointment this morning that I was supposed to stay up and get her to. I think she may have to reschedule that one - it's too distant for these sorts of conditions. I'm regretting now having agreed to drop a client at the train station on my way home. Drat & curses.

Maybe I should go listen to Lena Horne sing some more....hmmm?

Oh Yeah.....

.... I made mention of this video a l...o....n.....g... time ago (before I knew how to link them) and happened across it again tonight. It is Craig Ferguson of the Late, Late Show doing a monologue about responsibility in media regarding celebrities in self-destruct mode. He also discloses his recovery from alcoholism. It's lengthy viewing, about 8 minutes, but a terrific perspective piece.

Check it out HERE.

A Couple More Pics

Sarah was kind enough to forward this one taken during their Christmas visit here of 4 generations - Mother Mabel, me holding Zeph, and Sarah. That would be a thorn (me) surrounded by 3 roses.

This is one taken last week after a relatively rare snow storm in Vancouver. Check out the expression on Zeph - too funny. What a guy!

Tah-dah!!

Lynda's wedding ring re-appeared miracurously on her ring finger back on Friday. We were in the kitchen clearing the counters after dinner when she pointed it out. 'Looks better as a whole set, doesn't it?' Yes hon, glad you're back.

The weekend was a mish-mash of clearing snow after the storm was finally done storming; I think it snowed for 24 hours straight. Thankfully stepson #3 and his friend the boarder did most of the shovelling at the house. I did a quicky job at my place and then headed to Mom's to get her driveway and walks cleared before Linda arrived home from the hospital with Lynda. Mom had already started working away on her's but I gave her proper hell and told her to get into the house and stay there. Lord, 83 and shovelling 8 inches of wet snow! Linda is moving gingerly and improving a little each day.

Lynda and I made a quick pit-stop at a flea market near home to see a fellow who is closing his booth down. He has become a friend over the last few years and gives us deals regularly but is now practically giving us what we want of his stock. He carries a variety of mineral and stone samples and related products. This time I chose a piece of quartz that is opaque all round except one face that had been cut and polished allowing you to see the interior of the stone. As I was paying for it I felt a hand clap me on the shoulder - it belonged to a gal I know from one of the local NA meetings. She's a very loud, talkative exuberant sort and we talked for a few minutes after introducing our spouses. As we were saying goodbye she grabbed me in a bearhug and announced loudly 'Hugs, not drugs!' (an NA saying). I thought Lynda was going to go through the floor. I just laughed and shook my head. What are you going to do??

My boarder Al had received his welfare cheque early last week and was waiting impatiently for Friday to cash it. I was looking forward to his rent money so I could pay a couple of utility bills and buy some food. It was unusual but he wasn't home when I arrived home Friday morning from my overnight shift; I thought he'd decided to get an early start to the day for a change. He still hadn't appeared when I left for Lynda's late that afternoon; wasn't there again when I landed in Saturday to clear snow. By then I was getting concerned - he doesn't have any disposable income to go anywhere. Sunday afternoon I arrived again, this time for a nap before my night shift, and still no sign. I checked around the house thoroughly to see if any of his or my stuff was missing. Everything seemed okay. My concern?? Al suffers from clinical depression, he is unmedicated and he has had previous episodes of heavy crack cocaine use. The high is a very temporary respite from the depression and the price is high - using causes all sorts of reprecussions. Guilt, remorse, shame, fear, paranoia all feed a more profound depression. I was relieved to see his boots at the front door when I got off work Monday morning. Shortly after I got up in the afternoon he confronted me with the news he had blown all his money on a crack run Friday into Saturday. Then he laid low in hiding not wanting to come home for fear of what I might say. Would I wait until his son got paid Friday for the rent money? He would bail his dad out then.
I haven't been actively trying to counsel him; just encouraging him to plug into local resources for his depression and get some help with his other problems. Now his staying is conditional on getting help; it isn't appropriate for me to do it directly with him one-on-one. We'll see what happens between now and Friday.

Life is never boring, is it?

Family Footprint

As promised, I said when I received another photo of Zeph that it would appear here. Sort of an unusual family portrait but a good one. Zeph will be 6 months old next week. That half-assed plan I had to go visit next month is gonzo; it was a short lived pipe dream. June will be along soon, right?

I did my overnight shift last night and the snow began to fall just before I was wakened to begin the day; before 6. It has been coming down hard and heavy ever since with strong winds piling it into drifts. The drive home around 10 was sloppy but now at mid-afternoon I'm debating the sanity of trying to drive over to the house in order to spend the night with Lynda. (It's normally a 10 minute drive) Looking out my window at passing traffic people are getting stuck, getting out to help push other cars and slip sliding about - not fun. It might be a good night to stay in with a pot of tea and a couple of good movies or a book.

This morning my boss returned my Johnny Cash book about the apostle Paul - The Man In White - so I may have to parcel it up to send off to cousin BJ. John said he had thoroughly enjoyed it and that it was evident Cash had put a lot of work and study into the writing of it.

Now ...... to pack up and get out in the white stuff .... or stay put. Hmm ... tough call. Did I tell you that Lynda told me 'she loves me' the other night?? She did. I hadn't heard that for an awfully long time.......